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the girlfriend's page
because no one has invented a contraceptive against getting hurt
How many singles who had sex still have each other?
What's wrong with having sex with someone you love so much? Especially when you're sure it will last forever? Well, most dating relationships don't last. Just because you're able to to have sex doesn't mean your mind and heart are ready.
Getting pregnant and catching diseases aren't the only ways that sex can hurt.
Contraceptives fail more often than you probably imagine. In fact, there's no such thing as completely "safe sex." But even if you're "lucky," premarital sex can leave emotional scars that you'll feel for the rest of your life.
You may have thought it was love, but it was really just sex.
When you're having sex with someone, it's hard to tell what you love — the person or the sex. So it's easy to wind up in a relationship, or even a marriage, with someone who's wrong for you. Developing the relationship first lets you find out if this is someone who you really love.
![[ Sex ]](graphics/alpha-hipview.jpg)
Having sex is no guarantee you'll stay together.
Lots of women give in and have sex to "keep" someone. Some even get pregnant, thinking that a baby will cement the bond. Then he leaves anyway. If you feel you need to have sex to keep someone you love -- is that person really worth keeping? Most men will find a woman more desirable if she chooses to wait.
After you've had sex with someone, breaking up hurts twice as bad.
When you trust someone completely and then that person walks away, you may feel used in a way you never have before. If you give your body to the wrong person, it won't take a baby or a disease to make you feel terrible. So think about waiting. You may be surprised at how good it can feel.
Some questions to consider...
- Is having sex outside of marriage in agreement with my own moral values?
- If I get pregnant, am I ready to be a single parent?
- If not, am I ready to deal with the pain of abortion or adoption?
- Do I really know this person?
- If the relationship breaks up, will I be glad that I had sex with that person?
- Is he pushing me to have sex?
- Am I pushing him to have sex?
- Am I sure that my partner is not infected with a sexually transmitted disease, including AIDS?
- Am I sure that I'm not infected with a sexually transmitted disease which I could give my partner?
If the answers to any of these questions is "no," then you'd better wait. If you've been sexually active, get yourself tested for STD's. If you need to talk to someone about your relationship, contact us.
Source: Adapted from "You didn't get pregnant..." U.S. Department of Heath and Human Services, Public Health Office, Office of Population Affairs.